My thoughts and encouragement on homeschooling

I am posting this letter that I wrote to a friend's inquiry of my thoughts on being able to successfully homeschool 5 children. She suggested that I share this as a blog post in hopes to encourage other moms who need encouragement, guidance or ...whatever : ) These are only my "thoughts". I am no expert. This is my experience. I hope if you need encouragement it will bless you, on a hard day or in the beginning as you wonder if this could even be a possibility in the life of your family. Blessings ~Theresa xo

"Wow, homeschooling..., it is definitely a very challenging thing that brings me to my knees and makes me feel my need of Christ all the more. First, I think you have to know WHY you want to do it? Ask yourself, your husband the question: WHY am I considering homeschooling? This answer will help propel you through difficulties...if your answer is because you want to disciple your children, because you want to have the ability to decide what they learn and do not learn, because you want to teach them to love learning and to love God simultaneously, this motivation will propel you through what will be some very challenging days.

Another thing that you have to remember is that homeschooling is not going to look like regular school, I have to remind myself of this all the time. It may look like 10 minutes of reading with the 5 year old and send them off to color or do an activity at the table and then 15 minutes of math with the 7 year old and then send them to read a chapter book for a little while. Then you go and sit on the floor and read to the little ones and build blocks for 20 minutes...school is a climate of learning in your home. It isn't going to always be what we may have known of school in the public realm or the private for that matter either. School has to have a plan, but you make the rules. If your kids are learning and learning to learn, you are doing them a wonderful service. And furthermore if you are talking about Christ as you sit, as you stand, as you walk along the way, you are doing them an even greater service. Teaching them to love and know Christ is a huge gift.

[Please don't get me wrong here. I do not believe that homeschooling is the only choice for a Christian family and that you you couldn't disciple or love your child if you send them to school. I think loving and discipling children looks different in every family}

Another very important thing to remember is that alot of your life is already "school". The library visits, making cookies, making bread, teaching chores around the house. These things add up to making useful and profitable people who will go out into society and add to it in a lovely way. You MUST FOCUS only on a couple things in the early years and leave the rest alone. Teaching the children to read and do math is essential. Everything else in the early years up to 4 th or 5th grade is extra. READ, READ, READ. Read to the kids, let them get books that they like at the library. Listen to books on CD, talk to them about what they are reading...reading in a home creates smart children. Whatever interests them, get a book and have them read it or if they can't read it to them, or have one of the kids who can read, read it to them. Reading is the largest part of school. It may not "look" like school, but just reading is benefiting your children in a million ways.

MOST IMPORTANTLY is to seek CHRIST. Nothing happens in my home except from the grace of GOD. Truly, I could not do this without Him. Begging Him in the morning to help me. Reading a scripture with my coffee. Bowing my head when things get absolutely crazy here. Seeking Christ is essential and the worth of it is immeasurable. He helps me so much. Those who wait on the LORD WILL renew their strength.

Homeschooling is hard for me, but I am doing it because I believe it to be a worthy cause with priceless dividends. You will need Christ immensely and you will need to ask Him, what needs to be done and what does not each day. Trying too hard to fill a day with school work when you have lots of little people around will not be a super peaceful home. It will take trial and error. But teach your children lots of Scripture at meal times, sing songs, talk about Christ and read as much as you can. WHen things get really rough and crazy, stop, take time to tickle, give them a break and put on a learning video, put on classical music and take out the blocks and crayons and just sit. Go for a walk or a ride in the car and put a book on CD in the player...drink in Christ so that you will be a "stream to feed the garden" of your children. HE CAN HELP YOU.
Ask Him for wisdom. He promises to give.

If I can be of any practical assistance to you, come over one night and I can show you what I use and we can talk about some practical pieces to simplifying your school life...I am not a pro, but I have been doing it for a long time now and I know THE ONE Who can help ; ) Let me know how I can serve you. I will pray for you in this big decision. God will give you grace for whatever you choose. xoxo"

Saying Yes Before the Watercolour Ponies Ride Away

If you are a parent, you know that it is almost part of our job requirement to say, "No". Well, not really, but it is our task to teach, to train, to guide. And alot of that entails saying "no". To be quite honest, I find that part of my job difficult and sad at times. With my five little people, somedays it seems like I have to say no ALL day! I hate that. I want to say "yes" so much more. And while some of that can't be undone, lots of "no" saying is necessary as little hearts and minds need to be taught what to do and pulled away from what not to do, I can say "yes" to these things:
~tickle time
~pillow fights
~sitting on the couch to look at a magazine with a big boy
~reading board books with the littlest girl
~playing memory or dollhouse with the other girls
~going upstairs to see the latest fort or lego creation

Sometimes, I find that I have a hard time saying "yes" to even these fun things, because of the pull of the laundry, the sticky wood floors that cry to be mopped, the sheets that need changing, the treadmill that is calling my name, you know, fill in the blank for whatever fills our days out of necessity. But so often, I hear that still small voice that says, "Just say 'yes'". "yes, is the best choice".
Have you heard the song "Watercolour Ponies"? Old, old one from Wayne Watson. In the lyrics it says,
"There are watercolour ponies
On my refrigerator door...
Brushed with careful little fingers
And put proudly on display
A reminded to us all of how time flies
Seems an endless mound of laundry
And a stairway laced with toys
Gives a blow by blow reminder of the war
That we fight for their well-being
For their greater understanding
To impart a holy reverence for the Lord"

Tonight I read the following poem that a friend posted and this just fit so nicely with what I think of so often, about saying yes and the watercolour ponies. I have to continually remind myself that one day my house will be clean because there will be no children here...etc, etc. I want to stay a minute longer tonight on the bed, play one more round of memory...soak it all in... cause as the song goes onto say, " They look a little less like little boys every day Oh the pleasure of watchin' the children growin' Is mixed with a bitter cup Of knowin' the watercolour ponies Will one day ride away."

My hands were busy through the day
I didn't have much time to play
the games you asked me to
I didn't have much time for you
I'd wash your clothes, I'd sew and cook,
But when you'd bring your picture book
And ask me please to share your fun,
I'd say: "A little later, son."
I'd tuck you in all safe at night
And hear your prayers, turn out the light,
then tiptoe softly to the door...
I wish I'd stayed a minute more...
for life is short, the years rush past..
A little boy grows up so fast.
No longer is he at your side,
His precious secrets to confide.
The picture books are put away,
There are no longer games to play,
No good-night kiss, no prayers to hear
that all belongs to yesteryear.
My hands, once busy, now are still
the days are long and hard to fill.
I wish I could go back and do
the little things you asked me to.
-author unknown

NOTE: to hear the song, go to the bottom of the page and pause the blog music before you play the song. The song starts somewhere around 3:00 on the video if you want to fast forward :)

One Reason for a Sweet and Clean Life

Read this and wanted to take a few minutes to write and think about it.

"Motherhood is a hallowed place because children aren't commonplace. Co-laboring over the sculpting of souls is a sacred vocation, a humbling privilege. Never forget".

This statement is chock full of truth that pierces straight to the heart. Children are far from commonplace but moreover, they are souls, not one unnoticed by God. And when a child is place in my care, I sorely need to remember that. A soul, a soul...this makes me think of one of my most favorite poems ever, by J.R. Miller:

Mothers of Young Children
Oh mothers of young children, I bow before you in reverence.
Your work is most holy. You are fashioning the destinies of
immortal souls. The powers folded up in the little ones that
you hushed to sleep in your bosoms last night, are powers that
shall exist forever. You are preparing them for their immortal
destiny and influence. Take up your sacred burden reverently.
Be sure your heart is pure and that your life is sweet and clean."

Knowing that I am fashioning souls and destinies, eternal ones, helps my perspective. Helps me get my mind and heart around my vocation, mommy, much better. In the ins and outs of a day, sometimes I forget, for seconds, minutes, hours, the bigger picture. Souls. That is why my life should be sweet and clean. That is why I need to stay close to the Father, that is why I need to be on my knees.

To train little ones to become big ones who serve the Lord is a large job. But the Father asks one thing of me and that is to abide with Him. He will bring the results, the fruits. John 15 talks so much about that. Keeping my life sweet and clean is the beginning of this grand task. And more and more I ask the Lord, "Give me more grace Lord, more grace."

From the Book of Micah, chapter 6:
6 With what shall I come before the LORD,
And bow myself before the High God?
Shall I come before Him with burnt offerings,
With calves a year old?
7 Will the LORD be pleased with thousands of rams,
Ten thousand rivers of oil?
Shall I give my firstborn for my transgression,
The fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?
8 He has shown you, O man, what is good;
And what does the LORD require of you
But to do justly,
To love mercy,
And to walk humbly with your God?

Between Broken Tables and Spilled Drinks

Well, if you don't already know, I am an emotional being. That's just the way God made me. And by His grace He is redeeming that for His glory, helping me to be self-controlled with my emotions moment by moment. Sometimes I fail, yes, it is true. But more than that, I do struggle from time to time with short bouts of depression and anxiety. It is in my makeup. For the most part, I am balanced and God helps me along the way, but I will not lie and say that it is always easy. In my flesh I think that everyone should have to experience a bit of anxiety and depression (the real deal kind) just so that they could be more sympathetic to those who struggle in that way. You know, walk a mile in another's shoes idea? But that is beside the point...

The past couple of weeks have been hard for me in this regard, which just makes me feel more pressed, things seem a little harder. Like for instance, we are keeping a couple extra little friends with us for a few days. Not easy when you are not feeling quite yourself. Well, one of them shattered the leg on our cute wooden play table. Boy, was I mad!! I let Mark deal with it; I was too frustrated. But did it really matter?? Really? Sure the boys needed to know that they were wrong and out of order, but in the grand scheme of things, did it really matter?

And today for instance, the girls were messing with their drinks while at the table and, of course, one spilled all over the place: Red Kool-Aid. Yes, they need to know not to play with their drinks at the table, but did it really matter? Was it worth getting in a pinch about?

Absolutely not! While I do a good job hiding my angry responses on the outside (usually), on the inside, some days, I am a the epitome of frustration and all for what? It doesn't do anyone any good to be frustrated or angry or mean.

My Savior would not have it so. My Savior would lovingly correct. He would speak truth in love. He would speak words of grace. He wouldn't get in a pinch or get all "stressed out". So on a day, or two or three like this, and in the minutes which some times lead to hours of situations like this, which really in turn leads to days and weeks and months of the mother's life, let me remember this, what my Savior says to my heart that seems to get all worked up and frustrated:

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
~Mathew 11:28-30

Thank You, Jesus for this verse. How often I need to meditate on it!!! And help me to remember, dear Lord, as I have read from Ann Voskamp, 'I am the the servant, not the Source'. You are the Source of life, of strength, of peace, of everything I need. Oh how good it is to belong to You, Dear Lord, Savior Jesus!!!